Tillis Memoir 'How to Lose Friends and Antagonize Presidents' Goes On Sale; He Calls His Hegseth Vote His 'Biggest Regret'
The retiring North Carolina Republican's book prints profane texts he says he sent Trump and criticizes several Trump officials. A senior White House official answered the leaked texts with an insult; on 'The View,' Tillis said he hopes Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth gets fired.
Both sides agree on the texts, and neither agrees on what they mean
The texts are not in dispute. In one, Sen. Thom Tillis wrote that if Trump had ever threatened him with a primary challenge, he "would have immediately told you to f--k yourself"[8]. In another, he wrote, "I care if you fail and right now we are failing"[8].
Tillis, a retiring North Carolina Republican, prints these in a new memoir. It's titled "How to Lose Friends and Antagonize Presidents." Broadside Books put out the 224-page book on Tuesday, Oct. 6, 2026[6][1].
Politico's Playbook published screenshots of the texts before the book came out. They're dated May 22 and June 6, 2026[8]. Tillis says he sent them to President Trump. Only Tillis's side has been published, not Trump's replies or the messages that set Tillis off[8].
"The biggest regret of my career"
The book's headline claim is about a vote, not a text. In January 2025, the Senate confirmed Pete Hegseth as defense secretary, 51-50. Vice President JD Vance broke a 50-50 tie[11].
Tillis voted yes. Republican Sens. Susan Collins, Lisa Murkowski and Mitch McConnell voted no[11]. Tillis now calls his vote "the biggest regret of my career"[1].
He says he was always skeptical of claims about Hegseth's management style, his treatment of women and his drinking. Hegseth denied all of them[1]. Tillis writes that he didn't want to be "the lone voice in the wilderness" blocking Trump's nominees[1]. He also says he "should've stopped" Robert F. Kennedy Jr. from becoming health secretary[1][2].
On ABC's "The View," Tillis went further. "I don't know if he'll be impeached. I hope he gets fired," he said of Hegseth[1][4]. That isn't wholly new. The Hill has reported that Tillis earlier backed Hegseth's impeachment.
What Tillis says is wrong at the Pentagon
Tillis gives specifics. He faults Hegseth for removing "solid career warfighters" and the Pentagon press corps[2]. Hegseth is "an actor," he says, but "not a manager"[2].
The book's cover features four figures: Hegseth, Kennedy, White House Deputy Chief of Staff Stephen Miller and former Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem[6][7]. No direct response from Hegseth, Kennedy, Miller or Noem appeared in the coverage reviewed here. Nor did any Pentagon reply to the call for Hegseth's firing.
Tillis frames the book as a warning from inside the party. He argues that people around Trump hurt the president's own agenda. He says he raised this privately. He also predicts Republican losses in November's midterms[3].
His defense of the original vote is a judgment call. In his view, one senator blocking a president's nominee should be rare[1].
The White House answers the texts, not the claims
A senior White House official spoke anonymously to Politico. Sending the texts, the official said, "shows what kind of character he is"[9]. Mediaite reported the official also used a vulgar insult against Tillis[9]. That insult answered the leaked texts, not the "The View" remark.
The White House case is about good faith. A senator who sends angry texts and then publishes them in a book is, in this view, not a neutral witness. Allies add that a president is owed loyalty on Cabinet picks. They also say a retiring senator profiting from private messages is settling scores[10].
That argument has a real incentive behind it. It moves attention from the book's charges against Hegseth, Kennedy and Miller to Tillis's motives. It also warns other Republicans against breaking ranks before the midterms.
The left's question: why vote yes?
Critics on the left take the opposite line. They accept his criticism of Trump's officials and press him on his record. On "The View," one co-host told him, "You say you regret it, but you keep doing it!"[5][13]
Their point is simple. Regret after the fact doesn't undo a vote. Tillis voiced doubts about Hegseth and Kennedy and still confirmed them. For Democrats, his quotes are campaign material. His account of following party norms also lets them argue that the whole Senate Republican conference shares the blame.
Tillis's position helps explain the tension. He's retiring, so he has no primary to protect[1]. A primary threat is the main tool a president uses to keep his party's senators in line. And the 50-50 math Tillis describes made each Republican vote decisive. He says that pressure is why he gave in.
A memoir also sells on revelations. Texts and blunt quotes released ahead of publication drive attention. That's part of why the texts reached Politico first[8].
Same book, three headlines
Coverage split by outlet. The Associated Press led with Tillis's own words and included Hegseth's denials. It called Tillis's vote "deciding," though in a 50-50 tie every yes was needed[1]. The Hill kept to a straight lead and listed his complaints without adding its own description[2].
On the right, the focus moved to tone. Townhall called the texts "whiny" in its own voice and played up the White House's "brutal" reply[10]. The Center Square's story was mostly factual, but its headline pointed to "profanity, bravado"[6]. The Western Journal and ZeroHedge also stressed the profanity[14][17]. Tillis's claims about Hegseth's management went mostly unexamined.
On the left, the Daily Beast called Tillis "betrayed" and the book "scathing"[7]. HuffPost said he was "grilled about repeatedly folding to Trump"[13]. MS NOW called his vote "pivotal"[12]. Those words treat the book's charges as true and make his voting record the hypocrisy angle.
In this search, no major outlet outside the U.S. covered it on its own. One Middle East aggregator, Pressbee, reposted The Hill's story[16]. Abroad, it appears to read as a U.S. party fight.
What the book can and can't change
Hegseth remains defense secretary. Removing him is up to the president. Impeachment would need a House majority, and conviction would need a two-thirds Senate vote. Tillis can't force either one.
His 2025 votes to confirm Hegseth and Kennedy stand in the record[11][1]. The book adds political pressure, not formal effect. What's left open is the midterm: whether Tillis's warning about November reaches his party, and whether the White House's focus on his character holds up.
Summary
Sen. Thom Tillis, a retiring Republican from North Carolina, published a memoir on Tuesday, Oct. 6, 2026. It is titled 'How to Lose Friends and Antagonize Presidents'[6][1]. In it, Tillis calls his January 2025 vote to confirm Pete Hegseth as defense secretary 'the biggest regret of my career'[1]. He says he was always skeptical of claims about Hegseth's management style, his treatment of women and his drinking. Hegseth denied all of those claims[1]. Tillis voted yes anyway. He writes that he did not want to be 'the lone voice in the wilderness' blocking Trump's nominees[1]. He also says he 'should've stopped' Robert F. Kennedy Jr. from becoming health secretary[1].
While promoting the book on ABC's 'The View,' Tillis said of Hegseth: 'I don't know if he'll be impeached. I hope he gets fired'[1][4]. The book's cover features Hegseth, Kennedy, White House Deputy Chief of Staff Stephen Miller and former Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem[6][7]. The book also prints profane texts that Tillis says he sent Trump. In one, he wrote, 'I care if you fail and right now we are failing'[8]. A senior White House official, speaking anonymously to Politico, said sending the texts 'shows what kind of character he is'[9]. Mediaite reported the official also used a vulgar insult against him[9].
The main dispute is not over what Tillis wrote. Each side sees a different question. Tillis's critics on the left, including co-hosts of 'The View,' ask why he voted for officials he now says he doubted. One co-host told him, 'You keep doing it'[5][13]. The White House and its allies cast the book as cowardice and score-settling by a senator on his way out[9][10]. Tillis presents it as a candid account of how Senate Republicans give in to pressure. He also warns that the party could lose seats in the November midterms[3]. No Pentagon response to Tillis's call for Hegseth's firing appeared in the coverage reviewed here.
The Event
On Oct. 6, 2026, Broadside Books released Sen. Thom Tillis's 224-page memoir, 'How to Lose Friends and Antagonize Presidents'[6]. In the days before the release, Tillis promoted the book on ABC's 'The View' and in other interviews[4][3]. Politico's Playbook obtained and published screenshots of texts dated May 22 and June 6, 2026 that are printed in the book. Tillis says he sent them to President Trump[8]. A senior White House official then responded in comments to Politico[9].
Undisputed Facts
- The Senate confirmed Pete Hegseth as defense secretary in January 2025 by a vote of 51-50. Vice President JD Vance broke a 50-50 tie[11].
- Tillis voted to confirm Hegseth. Republican Sens. Susan Collins, Lisa Murkowski and Mitch McConnell voted no[11].
- Tillis's memoir, 'How to Lose Friends and Antagonize Presidents,' is published by Broadside Books and went on sale Oct. 6, 2026[6][1].
- In the book, Tillis calls his Hegseth vote 'the biggest regret of my career' and says he 'should've stopped' Robert F. Kennedy Jr.'s confirmation[1][2].
- On 'The View,' Tillis said of Hegseth: 'I don't know if he'll be impeached. I hope he gets fired'[1][4].
- The book includes texts Tillis says he sent Trump. In one, he wrote that if Trump had ever threatened him with a primary challenge, he 'would have immediately told you to f--k yourself'[8].
- Politico did not publish Trump's replies or the messages that prompted Tillis's texts[8].
- A senior White House official, speaking anonymously to Politico, said sending the texts 'shows what kind of character he is'[9].
The Pressure
Strip away the moralizing and blame. What structural realities persist regardless of which narrative wins?
- Retirement frees a senator
- Tillis is retiring, so he faces no future primary. That removes the main tool a president uses to keep his party's senators in line[1][8].
- Party-line confirmation math
- Hegseth's nomination tied 50-50 after three Republicans voted no[11]. In a Senate that close, each Republican vote is decisive. That is the pressure Tillis says he gave in to when he chose not to be 'the lone voice in the wilderness'[1].
- Midterm positioning
- Tillis predicts Republican losses in November[3]. Each side wants to set the story before then. The White House wants Tillis's motives to be the story. Democrats want the book's charges to be.
- Book economics
- A memoir sells on revelations. Publishing private texts and blunt quotes ahead of release drives attention and sales. That is part of why the texts surfaced through Politico before the book came out[8].
Material realityHegseth remains defense secretary. Removing him is up to the president, or would require impeachment by the House and a two-thirds conviction vote in the Senate. Tillis can vote but cannot force either outcome. His 2025 votes to confirm Hegseth and Kennedy stand in the record[11][1]. Only Tillis's side of the text exchange has been published, so readers cannot see what Trump wrote to set it off[8]. The texts are dated May 22 and June 6, 2026[8].
Narrative as a weaponThree groups are shaping how this story is seen. Tillis wants readers to see a principled insider who warned the president privately and is now telling the truth. The White House wants readers to see a bitter, departing senator who lacked the nerve to say it face-to-face[9]. Left-leaning outlets and talk-show hosts accept his criticism of Trump's officials but want readers to see that he voted for those officials anyway[5][13]. Right-leaning outlets mostly skip what Tillis actually claims about Hegseth and focus on his tone[10][14]. Wire coverage sits closest to the record, with one exception: it calls a vote in a 50-50 tie 'deciding.'
How Each Side Sees It
Each major actor’s view — how it frames things, its underlying incentive, and how it’s materially affected. Tap a side to read it.
Frames it asTillis presents the book as a warning from inside the party. He argues the people around Trump hurt the president's own agenda, and that he was raising this privately. He wrote Trump, 'I care if you fail and right now we are failing'[8]. He calls his Hegseth vote a mistake. He gives specific complaints: Hegseth's removal of 'solid career warfighters' and of the Pentagon press corps[2]. He also gives a test of fitness: Hegseth is 'an actor,' Tillis says, but 'not a manager'[2]. He defends his original vote as a judgment call. In his view, a single senator blocking a president's nominee should be rare[1]. His criticism of Hegseth predates the book: The Hill has reported he earlier backed Hegseth's impeachment.
WhyTillis is leaving the Senate, so he no longer has a primary election to protect[1]. The book lets him shape how his record is remembered and sells his account of events. It also gives him a platform to influence the party before the midterms[3].
Impact on themHe is taking public fire from the White House[9]. He is also being pressed from the left over his voting record[5][13]. Because he is retiring, he faces no direct voter penalty. His remaining months in the Senate may come with less goodwill from the administration.
Frames it asThe White House argues that Tillis's conduct, not its own, is the real issue. Its case: a senator who sends angry texts and then publishes them for a book is acting in bad faith. A senior official said sending the texts 'shows what kind of character he is'[9]. Allies add that a president is owed loyalty on his Cabinet picks, and that a retiring senator profiting from private messages is not a neutral witness[10].
WhyThe White House wants to shift attention from the book's charges against Hegseth, Kennedy and Miller to Tillis's motives. It also wants to discourage other Republicans from breaking ranks before the midterms.
Impact on themA Republican who voted for Hegseth now says he should be fired[1]. That gives critics a quote from inside the party. It arrives during a midterm campaign that Tillis says could go badly for Republicans[3].
Frames it asHegseth denied the claims about his management, treatment of women and drinking that came up at his confirmation[1]. The Senate confirmed him and he has served since January 2025[11]. No direct response from Hegseth, Kennedy, Miller or Noem appeared in the coverage reviewed here.
WhyHegseth wants to keep his job and his standing with the president. The other officials named want to blunt a critique from a Republican senator who voted for most of them.
Impact on themTillis says he hopes Hegseth is fired and is not sure he will be impeached[1]. Removing a Cabinet officer is up to the president. Impeachment would need a House majority, and conviction would need a two-thirds Senate vote. So the book adds political pressure but has no formal effect.
Frames it asCritics on the left say regret after the fact does not undo a vote. Their point: Tillis voiced doubts about Hegseth and Kennedy but still confirmed them. That record, they argue, says more than the book does. Co-hosts of 'The View' told him, 'You say you regret it, but you keep doing it!'[5][13].
WhyThey want to use a Republican's own words against the administration while still holding him accountable for his votes, especially before the midterms[3].
Impact on themTillis's quotes give them material for campaigns and for oversight of Hegseth's Pentagon. His insistence that he followed party norms also lets them argue that the whole Senate Republican conference shares the blame.
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The Bias Ledger average rating 4.9
The same story, as framed by outlets across the spectrum, ordered least to most biased. The bias score (1 = straight, 10 = heavily spun) is an AI assessment of that framing — click an outlet to see its track record. The tell is the word choice or omission that reveals the angle.
| Outlet | Vantage | Bias | How they frame it | The tell |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Associated Press | U.S. center | 2 | Republican Sen. Tillis calls his vote for Hegseth the 'biggest regret of my career' in a new book | It leads with Tillis's own words and includes Hegseth's denials. One word goes further than the facts: it calls Tillis's vote the 'deciding' one, when every 'yes' was needed in a 50-50 tie. |
| The Hill | U.S. center | 2 | Thom Tillis calls confirming Pete Hegseth the biggest regret of his career | A straight lead. It gives Tillis's specific complaints (fired career officers, the Pentagon press corps) without describing them in its own words. |
| The Center Square | U.S. right-leaning (free-market; funded by the Franklin News Foundation) | 4 | Tillis' memoir due out Tuesday laden with profanity, bravado | The body is mostly factual. But the headline's 'profanity, bravado' frames Tillis's tone ahead of his substance. |
| MS NOW | U.S. left | 4 | Retiring Thom Tillis regrets pivotal vote to confirm Hegseth | 'Pivotal' raises the stakes of one vote. The headline itself is otherwise restrained. |
| The Daily Beast | U.S. left | 7 | Betrayed Republican Senator Thom Tillis to Expose Trumpworld in Scathing New Memoir | 'Betrayed,' 'expose' and 'scathing' treat the book's charges as already shown to be true and cast Tillis as a wronged insider. |
| HuffPost | U.S. left | 7 | Thom Tillis Grilled About Repeatedly Folding To Trump | 'Repeatedly folding' is the outlet's own judgment. It turns the co-hosts' question into a conclusion. |
| Townhall | U.S. right (conservative opinion-news) | 8 | Trump White House Had a Brutal Response to Thom Tillis' Whiny Texts About Trump | 'Whiny' is the outlet's own word, not one it attributes to anyone. The story is about the White House insult, not the book's claims. |
References
- Sen. Tillis says his vote for Hegseth was 'biggest regret of my career' in new book — PBS NewsHour (Associated Press) · U.S. center; AP is a nonprofit news cooperative, PBS is publicly funded
- Thom Tillis calls confirming Pete Hegseth the biggest regret of his career — The Hill · U.S. center; owned by Nexstar Media Group
- Tillis book rips into Trump administration, predicts GOP defeats in November — Spectrum News · U.S. center; local news owned by Charter Communications
- 'The View': Sen. Thom Tillis appears on the ABC daytime talk show to discuss his frustrations with Capitol Hill, promote his book — ABC11 (WTVD) · U.S. center; ABC-owned station (Disney), same parent as 'The View'
- Thom Tillis Pushed Hard On 'The View' About Voting for Trump Cabinet Members: You Say You Regret it, But 'You Keep Doing It!' — Mediaite · U.S. center-left media-news site
- Tillis' memoir due out Tuesday laden with profanity, bravado — The Center Square (via Just the News) · U.S. right-leaning; funded by the Franklin News Foundation (free-market network)
- Betrayed Republican Senator Thom Tillis to Expose Trumpworld in Scathing New Memoir — The Daily Beast · U.S. left-leaning digital outlet
- Thom Tillis Reveals Expletive-Filled Texts He Sent To Trump — HuffPost · U.S. left-leaning; owned by BuzzFeed Inc.
- White House Brands Republican Senator a 'P*ssy' Over Fiery Texts to Trump: 'Shows What Kind of Character He Is' — Mediaite · U.S. center-left media-news site
- Trump White House Had a Brutal Response to Thom Tillis' Whiny Texts About Trump — Townhall · U.S. right; conservative outlet owned by Salem Media Group
- Senate confirms Pete Hegseth as Trump's defense secretary in 51-50 vote — CBS News · U.S. center; owned by Paramount Skydance
- Retiring Thom Tillis regrets pivotal vote to confirm Hegseth — MS NOW · U.S. left; progressive cable news network (formerly MSNBC), owned by Versant
- Thom Tillis Grilled About Repeatedly Folding To Trump — HuffPost · U.S. left-leaning; owned by BuzzFeed Inc.
- GOP Senator's Confrontational, Profanity-Laced Text Messages to Trump Revealed in New Book — The Western Journal · U.S. right; conservative digital outlet
- Vice President Vance casts tie-breaking Senate vote to narrowly confirm Pete Hegseth as defense secretary — Associated Press (via Yahoo News) · U.S. center; nonprofit news cooperative
- Tillis calls Hegseth vote his 'biggest regret' — Pressbee · Middle East-based news aggregator; reposts other outlets' copy
- "Told You To F--k Yourself": GOP Senator Tells Trump Off In Profanity-Laced Leaked Texts — ZeroHedge · U.S. right-libertarian / contrarian finance and politics blog